Wow. So, a lot has happened since I've last posted. I read East of Eden by John Steinbeck in April, Boundaries in May, and Where the Wild Things Are in June (thanks to the Rener family). Currently, I'm reading Here and Now by Henri Nouwen with my madre. We've had some really great discussions because of this book, and I'm grateful for it. Henri Nouwen has a beautiful and authentic heart, and he really desires to love God and others - you can just tell.
Steve is commercial salmon fishing in Alaska for more than a month. He returns July 18th, and I seriously can't wait! But, I have to wait, and God has been teaching me to rely on him and not Steve. Trust Him, and not other people and things. It hasn't been easy, but this long, long, long distance relationship is making me realize how much I really do neglect my relationship with Abba. Right now, Steve is the one I love but he is invisible. He is not here to hold me or kiss me or tell me face-to-face that he loves me. He sends me letters and occasionally, I hear from him via the phone. But the yearning I have for him is ridiculous, and I want to spend time writing letters to him, making him packages, and just thinking about him. I want this desire to translate into my relationship with Abba. I want to be so consumed with love for him that I'm consumed with his presence and expend my energy in loving him like I do for Steve. I'm learning a lot which learning and growing is always good, but it's usually never easy. So, I remain challenged; and I remain confident that Abba loves me without condition or any kind of reserve.
Well, that's all I have to say. Besides, I really feel blessed to have as many friends as I do and blessed by people who have shown me so much love. So thanks to all my friends and family in Tejas - you really know how to make a girl feel special.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
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5 comments:
What did you think of "East of Eden." I love John Steinbeck!!
~angelic
Mishy, Mish, thanks for sharing these deep things of the heart --- I am very interested in your reflections. Matt is leaving for a six week treck in the mountains soon and I'm sure it will be hard but rich for me as well - so i'm glad to have heard your thoughts. AND HERE AND NOW by Nouwen is one of my absolute "i would take on a deserted island if it's the only thing i could have" type of book! I go back to it again and again. I love his thoughts on "joy" and how we have to "choose" it for ourselves - very profound and inspiring! i love you - though it's been years since we've been face-to-face - you're always near to my heart~~
Jenny and the kids were away form me in Texas for 3 weeks and it just about broke me. Waiting can be so difficult. Jenny heard this Beth Moore series talking about waiting on the Lord instead of people and events and how when we wait on Him we are lifted up and we soar (Is. 40).
I pray the Lord eases your wait for your hubby!
Lic, East of Eden was incredible. What a timeless book that I read quickly because I was so engaged! I loved all the motifs, nature vs nurture, good vs evil, light vs dark, etc and the tie ins with Adam, the first man and the Asain man who was so wise :)
Hiya Brandon! Hope things are going well for you!! Steve is back and I'm basking in his wonderful, funny, loving presence! Thanks for the word of encouragment :)
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